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Your momma is so fat that to get her through a door you have to butter it up and throw a twinkie on the other side!!!
Never fight with lightning. It always strikes back.
Towel Waving
A man and a woman were married, and no matter how hard the man tried he could not get to woman to orgasm. He went to a doctor, and the doctor told him he might need some exotic things in the bedroom. So the man hired an escort and went back to their place. And got the escort to wave a towel at them while they were making love, nothin happened. The man went to the doctor and explained what happened, the doctor suggested that they switch, the escort having sex with the woman and the man waving the towel. That night the woman had three orgasms. And after the man said to the escort. "Thats how you wave the bloomin towel!!"
A man and a woman were married, and no matter how hard the man tried he could not get to woman to orgasm. He went to a doctor, and the doctor told him he might need some exotic things in the bedroom. So the man hired an escort and went back to their place. And got the escort to wave a towel at them while they were making love, nothin happened. The man went to the doctor and explained what happened, the doctor suggested that they switch, the escort having sex with the woman and the man waving the towel. That night the woman had three orgasms. And after the man said to the escort. "Thats how you wave the bloomin towel!!"
What's the Difference?
What is the difference between a porcupine and an FBI agent?
A porcupine has pricks on the outside.
What is the difference between a porcupine and an FBI agent?
A porcupine has pricks on the outside.
Four Catholic Ladies
Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together. The first one tells her friends, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'." The second Catholic woman chirps, "My son is a Bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Grace'." The third Catholic woman says smugly, "My son is a Cardinal. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Eminence'." The fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence. The first three women give her this subtle "Well.....?" She replies, "My son is a gorgeous, 6'2", hard bodied stripper. When he walks into a room, people say, 'Oh my God...'."
Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together. The first one tells her friends, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'." The second Catholic woman chirps, "My son is a Bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Grace'." The third Catholic woman says smugly, "My son is a Cardinal. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Eminence'." The fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence. The first three women give her this subtle "Well.....?" She replies, "My son is a gorgeous, 6'2", hard bodied stripper. When he walks into a room, people say, 'Oh my God...'."
Sickipedia
I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?
I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?
Blondes
There are 10 people holding onto the wings of a plane, 9 blondes and 1 brunetee. The plane starts sinking. A blonde says that somebody needs to let go. The brunetee makes a heroic speech about how she will let go to save the rest and all the blondes clap...
There are 10 people holding onto the wings of a plane, 9 blondes and 1 brunetee. The plane starts sinking. A blonde says that somebody needs to let go. The brunetee makes a heroic speech about how she will let go to save the rest and all the blondes clap...
What is a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross country
Cross country
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