Mature -
Adult oriented jokes
Wife
My wife told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy.
You should've seen her face when I came home drunk.
My wife told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy.
You should've seen her face when I came home drunk.
Andy
Q: Wht wud be the most romantic horrible scene?
.
Ans: A guy is enjoying french kiss with her girlfriend
n suddenly she vomits! :-D :-D
Q: Wht wud be the most romantic horrible scene?
.
Ans: A guy is enjoying french kiss with her girlfriend
n suddenly she vomits! :-D :-D
Lifeguard
I recently lost my job as a lifeguard.
Apparently tapping the "no bombing" sign at a muslim family as they walk past is classed as offensive.
I recently lost my job as a lifeguard.
Apparently tapping the "no bombing" sign at a muslim family as they walk past is classed as offensive.
Mistake
It's funny how one little mistake can ruin everything you've worked so hard for.
Fucking tetris...
It's funny how one little mistake can ruin everything you've worked so hard for.
Fucking tetris...
Urinal
I recently found out that when using the urinal 33% of men hold their cock with their left hand and 67% use their right.
89% wanted to know why I was watching them piss.
I recently found out that when using the urinal 33% of men hold their cock with their left hand and 67% use their right.
89% wanted to know why I was watching them piss.
Santa
Dear Santa,
For Christmas I'd like a big fat bank account and a lovely slim girlfriend.
PLEASE don't mix them up like you did last year.
Dear Santa,
For Christmas I'd like a big fat bank account and a lovely slim girlfriend.
PLEASE don't mix them up like you did last year.
Trapped
When I was younger, I always used to feel like a man trapped in a woman's body.
However, that all changed when I was born.
When I was younger, I always used to feel like a man trapped in a woman's body.
However, that all changed when I was born.
Glee
It's been announced that a 3D movie of 'Glee' is in the works.
Apparently the 3D is so good, it feels like the characters are literally pulling you out of the closet.
It's been announced that a 3D movie of 'Glee' is in the works.
Apparently the 3D is so good, it feels like the characters are literally pulling you out of the closet.
Sooner Or Later...
Many 11 year old boys believe doing something brave and courageous will make them a man.
4 years later, they will have attempt to prove their a man once again. If you get what I mean...
Many 11 year old boys believe doing something brave and courageous will make them a man.
4 years later, they will have attempt to prove their a man once again. If you get what I mean...
Showing 81 to 90 of 341 jokes.
