Bar -
Bar jokes, best said in bars.
What did the me say to the pink
Get some pink in you
Get some pink in you
Wales
I was at the bar the other night and overheard three very hefty women talking at the bar. Their accent appeared to be Scottish, so I approached and asked "Hello, are you three lassies from Scotland ?"One of them angrily screeched, "It's Wales, Wales you bloody idiot!"
So I apologized and replied, "I am so sorry. Are you three whales from Scotland ?"
And that's the last thing I remember.
I was at the bar the other night and overheard three very hefty women talking at the bar. Their accent appeared to be Scottish, so I approached and asked "Hello, are you three lassies from Scotland ?"One of them angrily screeched, "It's Wales, Wales you bloody idiot!"
So I apologized and replied, "I am so sorry. Are you three whales from Scotland ?"
And that's the last thing I remember.
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants
Bartender: that looks awfully in comfortable
Pirate argh it's driving me nuts
Bartender: that looks awfully in comfortable
Pirate argh it's driving me nuts
Midget
A midget walks into a bar orders a shot and a drink takes his shot stands up and says who's the biggest mother fucker in here? The bartender points across the bar to a man. The midget goes over there beats his ass drinks his drink than leaves. He comes in the next day takes a shot stands up and says who's biggest motha fucka in here? A man stands up. He goes over there beats his ass drinks his drink then leaves. The bartender was getting mad because he was taking away all of his business so he put a gorilla in the back room to set him up. So he comes back takes a shot and asks who's the biggest guy? the bartender says the man in the back room. So he goes back there and in 20 mins he comes out and says when that nigga wakes up tell em that his fur coats hanging out in the ally
A midget walks into a bar orders a shot and a drink takes his shot stands up and says who's the biggest mother fucker in here? The bartender points across the bar to a man. The midget goes over there beats his ass drinks his drink than leaves. He comes in the next day takes a shot stands up and says who's biggest motha fucka in here? A man stands up. He goes over there beats his ass drinks his drink then leaves. The bartender was getting mad because he was taking away all of his business so he put a gorilla in the back room to set him up. So he comes back takes a shot and asks who's the biggest guy? the bartender says the man in the back room. So he goes back there and in 20 mins he comes out and says when that nigga wakes up tell em that his fur coats hanging out in the ally
A man walks into a bar
OUCH!
OUCH!
I like to eat food
Even though it makes me poo
I also like wal-mart
Even though it smells like a fart
I don't think girls are hideous
Even though there idiots
I like my iPod
Even though it is flawed
Even though it makes me poo
I also like wal-mart
Even though it smells like a fart
I don't think girls are hideous
Even though there idiots
I like my iPod
Even though it is flawed
Pirats
A sailor meets a pirate on a bar and the sailor couldn't help but notice the pirate had an eyepatche, peg leg and a hook hand. So the sailor asked about them so the pirate said i got my pegleg when I was washed over board and a shark bit my leg off! Then the sailor asked how did u get ur hook hand ? The pirate replied I was in a fierce with another pirates and cut my hand off. The. The sailor asked how did u get ur eyepatches ? The pirate replied a seagull pooped in my eye. The sailor said you mean to tell me that u lost ur eye just bcuz a seagull pooped in ur eye?!??!?! The pirate said well u see it was the first day I had me hook
A sailor meets a pirate on a bar and the sailor couldn't help but notice the pirate had an eyepatche, peg leg and a hook hand. So the sailor asked about them so the pirate said i got my pegleg when I was washed over board and a shark bit my leg off! Then the sailor asked how did u get ur hook hand ? The pirate replied I was in a fierce with another pirates and cut my hand off. The. The sailor asked how did u get ur eyepatches ? The pirate replied a seagull pooped in my eye. The sailor said you mean to tell me that u lost ur eye just bcuz a seagull pooped in ur eye?!??!?! The pirate said well u see it was the first day I had me hook
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